Rise of the Status Update

The growth of Twitter, Facebook, Myspace and numerous social media sites has been phenomenal. Millions of users all over the world are reconnecting with their classmates, friends, family and colleagues. They are posting comments, sharing photos and links and updating their 'status' from the web & mobile.

What drove users to flock to social media sites, to share their views and update followers with up to the minute account of their activities? Why are people all around the world getting addicted to Facebook, Twitter or Orkut? These people are from diverse backgrounds, races, nationalities, education and social upbringing. Yet they are all flocking to social media sites. They are updating their 'status' with up to the minute report of their activities.

I believe it all comes down to the inner need for people to be recognised, to be heard and for the longing for the 'one minute of fame'. Human beings are social in nature. From the ancient times, we have lived in groups and had a social connection with other humans. We all like to be heard, for our views to be respected and to be 'liked' by others. We love to share our feelings and to connect with other people.

The rise of the status update is an example. Do people really care if you are eating a fat free ice cream while watching Avatar in 3d, at the premiere show? Do we really need to know where you are at this minute and how bad the traffic was?

Yet, we continue updating our status with up to the minute information. We all want to be heard. It feels nice to express our feelings, our views and our life updates. We all hope that others will be reading and commenting on our actions. We all have a voyeuristic tendency within us.

Status updates gives us our instant 'one minute of fame'. We love it when users comment on our witty status update or tell us how happy they are for us. We love to feel connected and that we are socially liked in this world.

After all, no man is an island.

Defeat the Evil Within

In India, we celebrate a festival called Diwali around this time, every year. (More...)

It Hinduism, it marks the return of King Ram to Ayodhya, after defeating the evil King Ravana. It also commemorates the killing of the evil Narakasura, by Krishna's wife Satyabhama. In Jainism it marks the attainment of 'moksa' of Lord Mahavira. In Sikhism it marks the release from prison of the sixth guru, Guru Hargobind Ji and 52 other princes with him. It also marks the martyrdom of the elderly Sikh scholar Bhai Mani Singh.

It ultimately signifies the triumph of good over evil, the banishment of everything vile in nature and the attainment of freedom and good everywhere.

We all have demons within us. On Diwali we wish everyone 'Happy Diwali' and indulge in revelry and exchanging/eating sweets. We clean and decorate our houses, paint and light colourful diyas and bursting fire crackers.

Do we take the time to look within us, to defeat and banish the evils lurking within? Throughout the year, situations & people fill us with negative thoughts and actions. Knowingly or unknowingly we all have negative and evil thoughts which diminish our presence on this planet, as human beings. Let us take this time of the year to finally get rid of the evils within each one of us. Let us sweep the filth away and emerge with a brighter and more beautiful soul.

Let our souls shine like the diyas we light.

Happy Diwali to one and all!

Colours of Life

God has filled our world with a fascinating blend of colours. Just take a look around you and you will see what I mean. Nature, in particular, is so beautifully infused with colours that it takes ones breath away. The harmony and blend of colours is to be marvelled in every creation of God. From this never ending spectrum of colours, which colours would be called as the "Colours of Life"? Go on take a guess.

Too many to choose? Here they are:

• Red
• Green
• Black
• Yellow
• White

How did I arrive at these colours? Just take a look around, at every human being on this planet. You will find these colours within each and every one of us.

RED: Blood

GREEN: Veins

BLACK: Hair, Eye(Pupil)

YELLOW: Bile in stomach

WHITE: Bones

These colours define our bodies and are present in most of the living organisms on this planet. These colours were also first recognised in ancient Jain (India) mythology and worship. These colours also form the basis of the ancient chinese practice of Feng Shui. (Link)

Recharge Yourself

You must have noticed that I have not blogged for quite some time. The reason? I wanted to recharge myself. Recharge my life, my thoughts and my being.

We are so wrapped up in our daily lives that we forget to charge ourselves. This fast paced competitive lifestyle continuously drains us of our energy force. Ever wondered why you feel so physically and mentally drained at the end of the day?

Think of yourself as a rechargeable battery. You need to charge yourself up, when you are running low. Take some time out, indulge in your hobbies, pick up a new skill, explore the natural world or just play with young children.

Energize yourself to give your best output.

Do Not Try

Throughout our life we are told to try. You will never know until you try. Try and great things can happen to you. So on and on.

Is it really the trying that gets results? I will try to be more patient, I will try to stay on my diet, I will try to work harder, I will try to wake up earlier, I will try to give up smoking. How many of these have you tried and gained success?

The Company, Nike, said it best when they used the slogan 'Just Do It'. Do not try, just do it. Either you do or you don't do. Its as simple as that. There is no trying. There is no mid way.

Either you plunge head on or don't take the leap at all.

When you set your mind and spirit on doing, there is no looking back. All the forces of the universe back you when you set your mind on doing. More often that not, you will achieve what you set out to do. Success or failure in the task is another thing. That depends on your skill and hard work.

But you will ultimately be able to do what you set out to do. That is guaranteed. Trying gives no guarantee. Trying is a way of saying to yourself that you do not believe. Its like saying to yourself 'Gosh, I don't know, maybe I will, may I won't. Lets see what happens'.

Either do it or don't do it. Don't pretend to try.

Cookbook for Life

Don't we all wish we had a 'Cookbook for Life'? One that would contain recipes for all our problems, for all the situations and challenges in our life.

Detailed recipes to create a mouth watering life! Wow!

Armed with such a book, we will never have to make mistakes, never have to experiment and never have to deal with failure. Whenever we face a situation, we whip out our 'Cookbook for Life', search through the index and go to the corresponding page. We simply follow the instructions and voila, instant solutions and success.

Guaranteed satisfaction. Each recipe has been tried and tested.

Would that really be great? Is that what life is all about?

Your individual experiences make up your life. That's what defines you and makes you unique. It makes your life, 'your' life.

If we knew exactly what to do each time, wouldn't life be monotonous? What would we learn and how would we grow as individuals? Yes, I agree that initially it will feel great to know how to deal with anything. However, I assure you, sooner or later extreme boredom will set in. There will nothing left to experience in our life. How would that feel?

Our mistakes, successes, failures and experiences make our life exciting. It makes us use our mind and explore its potential. We are born on Earth to grow as individuals, to realise the best within us.

Make the journey of life your own and cherish every moment. You do not want instant solutions, you want life experiences.

Experiences which one day, you can tell your grandchildren when putting them to sleep.

Beliefs vs Knowledge

We all have beliefs in our lives. These have been handed down to us through our parents, friends and social environment. Some of them we form on our own. We base our existence on these beliefs and we assume everything which we have been told to believe is true.

Are beliefs good for us or do they restrict us? Why does someone believe in something and another person does not? Yet they both fare equally well in life? You may believe its bad luck to walk under a ladder yet someone else might ridicule the notion. Who is right?

That's when the power of knowledge comes in. We have beliefs built into us from birth. Whether we accept them or not is up to us. However blindly accepting a belief is stupidity. Just because someone else believes something does not make it true. Beliefs are uncertain whereas knowledge is certain. Once you have the knowledge of something, you simply know its true. You cannot question it's existence or power.

You want to know why that belief is there in the first place and whether the belief is doing you good or restricting you. Get rid of your debilitating beliefs by placing knowledge behind them. Know them for a fact.

Do not let beliefs restrict you. Instead turn these beliefs into knowledge and the power behind the knowledge will make miracles happen. Plato defined knowledge as "Warranted True Belief". You do not want false beliefs binding you down.

In business for example, you might have the belief that a potential customer will not give you the order for whatever reasons. That might prevent you from approaching the customer in the first place. Your belief will restrict you. You will not know until you approach, ask and discuss with the customer. Who knows, he might say 'Yes'? Even if he says 'No' you now know your belief to be true. Until you ascertain the truth, is it prudent to keep on believing?

Believe in yourself and know that that belief is certain.

Facing the Wrong Way

You have a greatness in you. The doorway to higher awareness opens inwards.

Most of us spend a good portion of our lives looking the wrong way. We look outside ourselves to find solutions for our problems. Whereas inward, is where the answers lie. All problems can be solved and any challenge can be met by looking within because that's where the solutions lie.

Spend some time in solitude. There is great strength in silence. That's when you can get in touch with the higher force. The force that will help you solve problems, to achieve goals and to gain success.

Looking outward will only distract you and will cause you to blame situations or people for your life. You will feel out of control because you will be placing yourself in another persons hand. No one can live your life for you. You have to live your own life.

Stop facing the wrong way. Look within and you will find bliss that you have never known before.

The Truth about Six Pack Abs - Part II

Okay, now that you have finally decided that you want six packs in 6 months, the first step is to define your goal. As mentioned in Part I of the series, six pack abs basically means getting your body fat down to 10% or lower.

So the first step is finding out your current body fat percentage. There are a number of ways to do this but to get an easy but approximate idea try the following:

Calculate Body Fat Percentage

Now suppose your body fat percentage works out to be 25%. That simply means you need to lose 15% of your body fat. Lets do the math.

Suppose you weigh 70 kilos. At 25% body fat you have 17.50 kilos of fat. That's 52.50 kilos of lean body mass.

Our goal is 10% body fat which translates into 7 kilos of fat (70 kilos into 10%). You have a lean body mass of 52.50 kilos. Add to this the 10% body fat of 7 kilos and your target weight will be 59.50 kilos.

So your target weight is 59.50 kilos and you need to lose 10.5 kilos.

IMPORTANT: Please note that woman have a higher body fat percentage than men. Women naturally have 10-15% higher body fat than men! If you are a woman, to get six pack abs please add this 10-15 percent. A woman with 10% body fat will be very unhealthy and prone to illness.

Ideal body fat percentage chart for men and woman

Please use the above link to find out acceptable values.

Now that you have defined your target and you know how much weight you have to lose, be mentally prepared for the transformation. You will require a combination of cardiovascular and weight training to achieve the goal, in a healthy way.

More of that in the next part of the series.

Majoring in Minor Things

"Most people fail in life because they major over minor things" - Anthony Robbins

Couldn't have been truer! We spend way too much time fretting over the unnecessary. We receive an ambiguous email, we spend hours wondering what it means. Our dinner is not cooked properly, we get nasty and stay that way till the next morning. We get upset and crib over other peoples bad habits. A friend doesn't call as promised, we wonder what he or she is upto.

The list is endless.

Do you have any idea how much energy you waste on minor issues? If you would have channelled that same energy on the things which really matter, miracles would have happened by now.

Infact, 80% of our time we are doing things which give us minimum results. Then we crib over how overworked we are and how we never have enough time on our hands.

We have wasted so much of our energy on these minor things, that we do not have energy left for the major issues before us. These major issues take backseat and we wonder why life is not heading in the direction we want it to.

Learn to distinguish between the major and minor things in life. Ask yourself, "Will this really matter to me a year from now?" If the answer is no, then don't spend too much time on it. Focus on the more important aspects of your life and you will see changes happening.

Changes which you want, the way you want them.

Chance to Believe

In every motivation speech you hear or book you read, the importance of dreaming big dreams will be hammered onto you. If you cannot dream it you cannot achieve it. We get enough chances to dream. You will find enough people who will motivate you by telling us to dream big and follow your dreams.

How many give you a chance to believe?

Belief can make miracles happen.We do not need chances to dream, we dream enough already. We need more chances to believe. We need people and situations which give us chances to believe in ourselves, in the power of the almighty and the power of our mind.

Chances to believe that:

• we can achieve our dreams
• we can do well
• we can be happy
• we can be healthy
• we can live the life we want
• we can raise a happy family
• we can make miracles happen
• things will work out no matter how bad the current situation is
• we have the power to achieve whatever we want to achieve.

Don't just make people dream, give them the chance to believe.

Build Castles in the Sky

The statement generally implies daydreaming - unreal and fantastic. You must have been told never to build castles in the sky. You must have been warned that if you do, you will fail and never succeed.

Boy, are they wrong!

All the greatest achievements in the world started as castles in the sky. They were only dreams of an individual or a group of individuals. At some point of time they were nothing but ideas and thoughts.

Castles by nature are built in the sky, not on the ground. Once you know how your castle looks and where you want it, only then can you start building the foundation beneath. How many architects do you know, who have built a house without knowing how it will look in the end? We always start out with a concrete image of the end result in our mind. Only then do we go out planning and realising the goal.

Its very easy to build castles in the sky. Thats when the demons come out to play. We are so satisfied with our imaginary castle that we forget to work on the foundation. We do not put our full strength into working and building the foundation. Many times our castles are like New Year resolutions, we work on them only for a week or month. Then then vanish. So will your castle.

Build castles in the sky but start building the foundation immediately. Give yourself a time frame and plan a definite way to reach your castle. Lay the full foundation. Always keep the image of your castle in your mind.

Once you have laid the foundation, the castle will emerge in reality.

Journey of Life

We begin our journey of life crying. That's our first response upon entering this world. Even though we are wailing our hearts out, people around us extremely happy. That's the onset of life.

A little further ahead our parents are teaching us to walk and talk. Pretty soon they are shouting at us to sit in one place and be quiet. That's life again.

We spend our childhood getting educated and sharpening our brains for the journey ahead. Some of us excel, others are average and some are downright miserable in this leg of the journey. We somehow pull through this phase and enter adulthood.

As adults we are expected to perform well, to be financial secure, to raise and provide for a family and to build a secure base for our children. Again some excel, others are average and some perform poorly here.

We enter into old age and begin to look back upon our journey of life. We look back upon all the things we should not have done and all the things that we could have done. Some look back with regret, at years wasted, and yet others look back with pride.

How does it all add up in the end? Each journey is unique and it is pointless comparing your journey with anyone else. The source (birth) and destination (death) is the same for everyone. Its the route that is different. The vehicle may be different. So will the passengers.

What is important is how you experience that journey. What matters is how well you drove your vehicle, not how fast you drove it. Savour each moment of the journey because this journey is your life.

Your life, no one else's.

Simplicity

Haven't you noticed that the best things in life are very simple in design? Take nature for example, how a simple breeze lifting a kite high in the air gathers smiles and how a simple flower demands awe. Simplicity denotes beauty, clarity and purity. Complex tasks can easily be accomplished if you break them up into simple steps.

Take the Apple Ipod for instance, there is great beauty in its simple design. That's the reason why it is so popular. The best designs in this world are all based on the concept of simplicity. Just have a look around you.

Why do we complicate our lives by creating complex thoughts, relations, habits and behaviour. Why don't we weed out the unnecessary complexities and live simple, uncomplicated lives? Keep your relations simple, whether personal or professional, and you will be ultimately rewarded. Keep your thoughts even simpler. You will begin to enjoy your life and be less stressed out.

If you are faced with an insurmountable difficulty, try breaking it down into simple steps. Tackle each step with simplicity. You will be amazed by the results.

The simpler the solution to any problem, the greater are the chances of achieving success.

As Antione de Saint Exupery put it "Perfection is achieved, not when there is nothing more to add, but when there is nothing left to take away".

Attention Seekers

Humans are social creatures. They require social interaction and feedback. Some of us get this naturally from our daily lives and our relationships. However there are people who cannot connect with their lives and relationships. They are constantly seeking attention by one way or another. They have low Emotional IQ's. They will often indulge in negative behaviour so that people will notice them.

These emotionally immature people are highly insecure and lack in confidence. To counter these feelings they are constantly creating situations in which they become the centre of attention. They can indulge in manipulation and deception just to get attention. They will get into arguments and fights just to get involved. It does not matter to them that the situations they are creating are highly negative and destructive. They just seek attention. Period.

They can exaggerate their illness and pain, can provoke situations which can cause or invite injury to gain sympathy and thus attention. They often exhibit a 'poor me' persona.

They can even manipulate lives by creating highly negative situations and then posing as the saviour. This way they can emerge as heroes and get the attention they require.

These people manipulate and twist facts into extraordinary proportions. They are drama experts who will exploit any incident, no matter how small or insignificant, into events of dramatic proportions. Everything is do or die with them.

Its a constant emotional boxing match with these kind of people. They desperately need to be in the centre of the ring, the star attraction. Nothing less than that will do. They will do anything just to get attention.

These people will verbally assault you until you cave in. They will draw you into battle no matter what you do. They will try to get victimised so that they can later gain sympathy. What they say or do never matters to them. What is important is just other peoples reactions and words.

Remember, these people will do anything for attention. Dealing with these kind of people is very challenging and will test your emotional IQ to the limit.

Energy Reserves

My son is 2 years old, my niece is 4 years and my nephew is 7 years. Its remarkable how much I learn from them.

Children are truly amazing. No matter what I do, I simply cannot match their 'play' endurance and energy levels. They seem to have unlimited reserves of energy. From the moment they wake up, they are up and running around whole day.

Have you ever played with children? How many minutes do you last with any kid? A few minutes, half an hour or maybe an hour? Its peanuts compared with how long these little kids can play with each other.

Where do they get their energy? How do they continuously replenish their energy? Why don't they seem to ever tire? Why do they seem so full of life?

I believe that we all have huge reserves of energy. Its what we do with these reserves that make the difference. Children do not waste their energy and neither do they allow anyone else to drain it. If you ever scold a kid unnecessarily, you will notice that they simply walk away from you. They will not allow you to drain their energies.

They utilize their resources to the best of their abilities. They are continuously replenishing their reserves by continuously laughing, screaming in glee and being happy. They are always positive, always exploring and learning. No obstacle can stand in their way. They will find their way around or over any hurdle that might come their way.

Haven't you noticed that even though playing with children physically tires you out, emotionally you feel like a million bucks? That's just the way children are. They spread out joy, happiness and laughter.

They do not waste their energies on sadness, guilt, unhappiness or sorrow. If they fall, they cry for a minute or two. Then they get back on their feet, smiling and being happy.

That's the secret to having unlimited reserves of energy.

Slumdog Millionaire Lessons

I am sure that most of you must have watched 'Slumdog Millionaire' by now. In case you haven't check out the wiki entry here or better yet, go and watch it.

The movie was brilliantly directed and very well packaged. No wonder it has won 8 Oscars! Apart from the technical brilliance of the movie, what else can we learn from it?

• YOU ALWAYS HAVE A CHOICE! No matter what your conditions, upbringing or environment, you always will have a choice. (Jamal and his brother both faced the same conditions yet Jamal chose to lead a good life whereas his brother chose a life of crime.)


• YOU CAN WIN! No matter how much the odds are against you, you can still win. You never know when you might be the 'lucky' one. (Jamal winning Who Wants to be a Millionaire)


• DREAM BIG! No matter how small your present life might be, never stop dreaming big. If you cannot dream it, you cannot achieve it. (Slum kids dreaming big.)


• SHIT HAPPENS BUT IT MIGHT BE FOR THE BEST! (Jamal jumping into shit to get an autograph from his favourite actor. The shit enabled him to get up close with his dream star.)


• TRUST WISELY. Many people will do anything for money. Do not just go by words or appearances alone. (Slum kids being exploited by those goons who lured them with food and money. The anchor trying to cheat Jamal by giving him wrong answer.)


• BE FOCUSED. In order to achieve your dreams, you need to stay focused, determined and be persistent. If you have these three qualities, eventually you will get what you want. (Jamal reconnecting with his true love after all those years. It was just pure focus, determination and persistence which got him Latika.)


• ADAPT. If you are resistant to change and adapt slowly, you will fail. You need to learn the art of adaption. If situations change, you need to change equally fast. This is a highly competitive world we live in, which is constantly changing. If you do not change with it, you will be left far behind. (Jamal adapting to every situation throughout the movie. Selling street wares, being a tourist guide, serving tea in call centre etc.)


• ENJOY YOUR LIFE. Do not brood over what you have or don't have. You will simply be wasting your life. Instead make the best of what you have and enjoy your life. (Slumkids enjoying their life despite their harsh conditions.)

These are just a few lessons we can learn from the movie. Hope you enjoyed the movie as much as I did.

The Truth about Six Pack Abs - Part 1

Six Pack Abs! Don't we all want them! This is perhaps the number one fitness goal that most people have. We don't care about how many miles we can run or how strong we can be, we just want six pack abs! Period.

If you are like the rest of us, that simply means 'trimming' the fat off your belly by doing regular crunches and some cardio exercises. Have you ever heard yourself say "The rest of my body is fine, just have to lose two to three inches off my stomach."?

In fact this is what most first time gym goers want. That's their number one fitness goal.

Are they way off! There is no such thing as spot reduction. You cannot, I repeat, cannot reduce fat off one part of the body. The only way to do that is through surgery. You have no control over the fat burning process. Get this straight first.

Another misconception is that if I do a hundred, two hundred or five hundred crunches a day, I will get six pack abs. Wrong! Doing this will definitely give you solid, strong abs. No doubt about that, but you will never be able to see them because they will be covered in layers of fat!

The only way to get six pack abs is to lower your body fat to below 10 percent. That's it. That's the magic secret. There is no other way. No miracle ab cruncher machines, sauna belt or pills will do it. These are all fake. Don't waste your time and money on them.

You now know the secret. Its simple. Just lower your body fat to below 10% and you will have six pack abs.

However to do this in a healthy way requires dedication, willpower and effort. In the next part of this series I will try to guide you through the process so that within 6 months you too can have six packs! I did it, so can you!

Where are You Aiming?

We all have our goals and targets. We accomplish some of them and then aim higher. We then set our sights on new targets.

One question you must ask yourself is 'Where am I aiming?'.

Have you set your aim only on your target? Will you be happy with a 90% or 110% hit? You may overshoot or undershoot your target in a matter of speaking. Will that satisfy you?

Simply put, aim much further than what you will be satisfied with. For example if you want to reach the moon, aim for the stars. Even if you miss the stars, you will have at least reached the moon! If your aim is earning more money, why set your sights on a million bucks? Make your target 2, 3 or even 5 million!

That way, in case you do fail in reaching your target, you will still end up smiling.

In life we do not always get what we want, but that shouldn't stop you from asking more! Who knows, you might get it and even if you don't, you will still end up the winner.

Ten seconds of Lifeflash

Take a minute out of your busy schedule and just head over to your desk or sit on your bed. Just stay there for a moment. Now you have exactly 10 seconds. Close your eyes and in those 10 seconds recall your life in a flashback. Your whole life, till this very moment.

Remember you have exactly 10 seconds, no less no more! At the end of the 10 seconds, remember to open your eyes. You have to go through your whole life in those 10 seconds.

Go ahead, do it now!

Done? Okay, what were the images you saw in those 10 seconds? Were they happy images or sad ones? Was there sound in those images? Were most of the images centred around you or did they involve other people? Were they of success or failure? What was it about those moments which made you flashback to them?

These are the moments which have defined your life. They were the moments which you will always remember. Where you are today and where you will be tomorrow, will be defined by such moments.

Our 10 second life flashback reveals a great deal about how we have lived our life so far. It also offers an insight on how we want to live it in the future.

A Child Gives Birth to a Mother

The other day I saw this stone figure of a child and mother at a highway junction. Below it was written "A Child Gives Birth to a Mother".

Brought a smile to my face!

If you think about it, a child really does give birth to a mother. How many of you actually thought it that way? I am sure almost none of you. We are so used to our traditional thinking that we do not even bother to think any other way.

How many situations can we turn around if we only change our viewpoint? Who knows the problem you might be currently facing might actually be an opportunity in disguise? Perhaps all that is needed is for you to change your view?

When faced with any difficult situation we always ask God 'Why me?'. Do we ever think 'Why not me?'. Maybe it is his way of making you stronger and better. If you look back at all the difficult portions of your life, doesn't it seem that you are now more able because of those situations?

Every moment of our life is a gift or a curse. Its how we view it which makes the difference.

Parasites

A Parasite is an organism which lives in a close relationship with another organism, its host, pretending to be useful but eventually causes the host harm. A parasite is dependent on its host for its survival.

Did you know that people can be parasites too? Parasitic people are those who habitually take advantage of others without making any useful return. They attach themselves to you, ostensibly pretending to do you good but all the time draining you of your life force.

How do you identify such people? These people have a way with words. They tell you that they cannot live without you and incase they do anything bad, it was only because they meant well. They did it for you. They pretend that they are doing whatever they can for your benefit but the reality is something else. They do it only for themselves. They know that without you they will just fade away. They pretend to be doing everything for your good but in reality its only for their own good. The sad part is they are aware of what they are doing but still continue to do so.

You will find these type of people in your personal and professional lives. Ever notice how some people always seem to leave you worse off, no matter what you do? Interacting with these people someone somehow seems to drain you. It may be the way they talk or behave. These people simply feed off your energy to fill their own.

In professional life, have you ever had a boss or colleague who does the same? He will boost you up, get good work done from you and in the end will take credit for all your work. Ever happened? When you confront them, they will sincerely apologise that it just happened and they did not mean it. They did it for your good only and next time they will make sure you get the credit. However these are just words, you know it never happens. Next time again they will do the same because that's the way they get their energy, their value.

These people will try to find your weaknesses and will exploit them for their own benefit. They will manipulate you in any way possible, just to fulfill their needs. If they want something, they will not hesitate to lie, deceit and manipulate you.

These kind of people drain your energy to fill their own. They literally feed off you. The more you allow them to do this, the stronger and bolder will they get. Ultimately you will be left a shadow of your former self.

Beware of parasitic people. They will destroy you in the end.

Success with Sporting Legends

Yesterday, I was watching the finals of the Australian Open 2009 between Rafael Nadal (World No.1) and Roger Federer (World No.2). It was an exciting match full of amazing tennis.

While I was watching the match, a thought struck me. Here are two great players with immense talent battling it out for glory. Is it just talent that got them here or is it something beyond that. What makes them rise to the top of their profession? What makes us call them 'Sports Legends'. Is it just winning a few titles or are there some qualities which all sporting legends practice which makes them who they are?

Despite being on top of their sport, these guys never stop learning. They know their own weaknesses and work hard to improve upon them. They take full advantage of their strengths and use it with deadly skill. They know their 'turf' inside out. What they do off the field is as important as what they do on the field. They study their opponents and know their opponents strengths and weaknesses. 

Just mere talent is not enough. They take talent and with consistent practice, they sharpen their skills to a razors edge. They play with the best and demand only the best. They always set the bar a notch higher. They are extremely focused around their chosen sport and on their skills. When you take talent and focus on it with determination, practice and dedication, it becomes like a laser cutting through anything that might stand it its way.

If you observe any sporting event, you will observe that behind all great players there is a team of dedicated and brilliant people. Like yesterday, when Nadal completed the winning shot, he immediately ran to his coach and team members. He knows that without them, it would be impossible to be where he is. Take a look at Formula 1 races, without a really good pit crew, do you actually think Michael Schumacher could reach where he did?

The other day I heard something equally interesting. Michael Jordan was once shooting for a commercial where he was required to miss the hoop. He had to retake 9 times! He had perfected his shooting skills so much, that he did not miss the shot 8 times even though he was required to do so deliberately! How did he do that? Through continuous practice and improving himself daily.

Is there a lesson which we as individuals or Companies can learn here? Just having skills or a great product will not take you to the top. You need to know your field, your competitors, your own as well as your competitors strengths and weaknesses. You need to constantly keep learning and improving yourself or your Company. You need to set the bar really high, to reach that height. You need to play with the best in order to compete with the best. Get a great team if you really want to reach the top. This will give you leverage which will make you achieve more than you can alone. See the Top Companies in this world, you will always see a good team leading these Companies to their greatness.

Perfect your skills or product to such an extent that you can compete with the best in the world. Once you do, keep observing, learning and improving so that you go higher and higher, until there is no one left to challenge you. Even when you reach that spot, don't get complacent. Keep on your guard and stay on top! Mary Pierce still gets up at 5 am and hits the treadmill at 5:30 every morning! Michael Phelps still trains 6-8 hours a day, even though he is probably the best swimmer ever!

Observing and following sporting legends habits can ensure you reach your best.

What is Life About?

What is this life about?

This is perhaps the hardest question to answer. Each one of us is faced with a different situation and therefore the answer might seem different initially. For some this life is all about earning more money, others might view health and happiness as their purpose in life, still others might view fame and recognition as what their life is all about.

On a deeper level, don't we all seek the same thing? Once you attain the above, what will you seek then? What will your life be about once you accomplish these things?

I believe that deep down we simply seek to:

• have a wonderful family life
  
• have atleast one or two really good friends
  
• engage in a work/job which gives us satisfaction as well as income
  
• be able to earn substantially to live a comfortable 'money worry free' life
• have someone to love and share our life with
  
• have a child who will carry on our family name and legacy
  
• have a house we can call 'Home'
  
• be known as a good human being
  
• have good health
  
• be able to get up in the morning with a smile
  
• lead a life to our best capabilities
  
• smile and be truly happy in life
  

Ultimately isn't this what life is all about? To be at peace with oneself and the world around us? To enjoy and be happy with the life we have been given?

If you have something else that you think life is all about, please post. I would love to hear about it. Lets lead enriching and happy lives.

Looking at the Better Side of Life

Thanks to my good pal Barinder for this post!

The other day he updated his Facebook profile with "Looking @ the brighter side of Life". I assumed this means that he has got a great job or a promotion and now things are really working out for him. It just struck me that it means something much more.

We all have our problems in our lives. No matter how successful we are, some issues will always crop up which will tend to weigh us down. That's when the brilliant thought from Barinder comes into the limelight.

Looking at the Brighter Side of Life.

No matter how bad things get or how much in a jam you think you are in, remember to always look at the brighter side of life. Things will work out, they always do in the end. That's simply the way it is. Ten or twenty years down the line when you look back upon the events gone by, you will also probably laugh and agree that it was for the best. In the end you did benefit from the experience somehow.

There is always a light at the end of the tunnel. The sun will definitely rise in the morning, no matter how long and dark the night might seem. Which is why we should always believe that things will work out. We should see the glass as half full instead of half empty.

Life is how we look at it. Choose to look at the bright side, always.

Two Heartbeats

Most of us go through life with only one heartbeat. This is enough to sustain us through life and live it pretty much the way we want to. 

I have two sources of heartbeats. You must be thinking that either I have gone raving mad or I have some serious anomaly! Let me explain.

First I have my own heart which pretty much takes care of the requirements of my body. It pumps blood to my entire system and sustains my 'life'. It beats on an average 100,000 times a day and hopefully will continue doing so for a very long time!

The other heartbeat comes from another source. It is basically what fills me with energy, hope, desires, love and happiness. It is the essence of my existence in a matter of speaking. It makes me overlook everything bad in this world. It quickly erases whatever pain I may be experiencing (whether physical or emotional) and replaces it with strength, love, peace and immense happiness.

The source of this heartbeat is my two year old son, Aujas.

His presence in my life gives me another heart. My body, soul and mind become twice as strong. When I see his smile or hear him speak all my pains, stress, irritations and shortcomings simply fade away. Even when I am at work, just imagining him gives me strength beyond the ordinary. When I think of him, no storm seems too rough or mountain too high to conquer. The twinkle in his eyes makes the impossible seems possible. 

He is my second heartbeat! Wouldn't you like to have a second heartbeat too?

Living versus Existing

There is a huge difference between 'living' a life and 'existing' in life.

Many of us feel that we are living our lives but in reality we are simply existing. How do we differentiate between the two? 

When we simply exist we :- 

• Do not take risks
  
• Live a predictable life
  
• Do not go after our dreams
  
• Lead our life as a boring ritual
  
• Do not grow as a person
  
• Achieve far less than what we are capable of
  
• Never are truly happy with ourselves
  
• Are constantly blaming others or situations for our life
• Start comparing our life with others
• Lack the ability to truly smile and laugh (ever heard a two year old kids laugh?) 
• Lack that 'spark' in our eyes
• etc. etc.

We are plagued by just 'existing' on this planet, living a life like zombies. We can easily predict what we will be doing a certain day, next week or next month. Hours turn to days, days to months, months to years and we never really achieve anything worthwhile. Remember your childhood years? How many of us have become what we thought of becoming as children? How many of us have even begun chasing our dreams? 

When you look back upon the past decade, did you do everything you could or wanted to? Is there anything you would have done differently? Do you regret how you spent the past decade or was it just the way you wanted it to be?

As someone once put it 'If you are not truly living your life, you are simply wasting oxygen!'. So true. 

A person who 'lives' their life is different. You can see it in their eyes, in their actions and the way they talk. They are always beaming with energy and positivity. Nothing seems to get them down, no matter how difficult the situation or environment around them.

Children are extremely good at living their lives to the fullest! Observe them.

Make a conscious effort to start living right now. If you are in a job, make sure it makes you happy as well as supports you and your family. If you are unhappy with any aspect of your life, change it. Be at peace with yourself. Laugh more. Start doing the things which you really want to do. Spend some quality time each week with yourself. 

Make you today good and tomorrow even better.

True Happiness

What is one thing that we all desire (apart from more money!)?

It is to be truly happy. No matter what stage of life we are in, all of us want to be happy. 

What is happiness though? Does it mean more money? Does it mean having a good job or good business? Does it mean having children or being happily married? Does it mean success? Does it mean driving a good car and living in a great house? Does it mean good health?

I believe that these are simply 'Happy phases' in our lives. Whenever we are lacking something in life, we tell ourselves that if only we had whatever we are lacking, then we will be happy. Once we get that, we become temporarily happy and then we desire more. We want something else to make us happy again. We again blame the lack of something for our unhappiness. This circle is endless.

To be truly happy you must be happy with yourself . That simply means you start living the life that you want to live. Start being the best that you can be. You are responsible for yourself, no matter where you are in life and its only 'YOU' who is accountable for your happiness. When you reach the stage when you can be truly content and happy with yourself, then and only then will you be truly happy.

People, situations, circumstances, problems etc. will come and go but none of it will be able to rob of your happiness. Instead of looking at outward happiness, look for it within yourself. Thats the path to true happiness.

Bad Habits Do Not Die

We all have habits. Some of them are good for us and some bad. Our life is essentially habitual in nature. We are what we do. 

Don't all of us, at some point in our lives, try to get rid of our bad habits? Do we succeed always? If you are like me, you will probably say 'NO!'. They are like zombies, we think they are dead but they reappear sooner or later.

Bad habits are the one that simply will not die.

To get rid of a bad habit you have to KILL IT! There is no use trying to beat it with a stick, hoping that it will die.  As long as you are beating it with the stick, it will be helpless and will fall down, presumably dead. You will then relax and throw away the stick. Unfortunately the bad habit has a nasty habit of rising from the dead and infecting you again and again. As long as you are on your guard it will pretend to be dead. The moment you let your guard down, chances are high that it will strike again.

What do we do then? Like I said before, to ultimately get rid of a habit, we will have to kill it so that it never rises again. To kill a bad habit, we must use all our force, all our willpower and end it with one good blow. You must eliminate it from your life in one final decision. No compromises can be accepted whatever. The decision is final!

To do this requires immense willpower and belief in yourself. You cannot compromise with your own life. You cannot accept this bad habit in your life. That's the way to kill it forever.

Take an example of smoking or drinking. Its a habit which plagues almost everyone on the planet. Yet how many are able to quit smoking/drinking for good? We make successful attempts only to 'fall' into the bad habit again. Yet we see many others who have successfully quit. To quit drinking or smoking you have to kill it the moment you decide you want to get rid of it. You have to STOP completely in one go. No use telling yourself you will smoke only 3-4 cigarettes or drink only occasionally. The habit will not go away. 

Its a moments decision which will decide its fate.

 

Muster the courage, develop a willpower of steel and simply kill the habit with one swift blow. Be determined that you will never accept it in your life again.

Kill the bad habits and live a better life.

Roots and Wings

The greatest gift our parents gave us were roots and wings. This was one of the 'perks' that life in the yesteryear's had to offer. 

Life was easier, more 'local' and did not involve such extensive travelling/shifting. As adults we all know where our roots lie, where we come from. We have a 'mother base camp' so to speak. No matter which part of the world we currently live in, we always know that we have a place called 'home'. It brings back fond memories and smiles.

Our parents also gave us wings to fly. There were no boundaries set upon us as children or even as adults. We were (within reasonable restrain) free to do what we want. Our parents did whatever in their means to support our dreams, desires and flight, even if it meant sacrifices on their part. A Sparrow, an Eagle or a Swift, it was our choice of whom we wanted to be. They simply gave us wings and let us decide how high we want to soar. 

As we had roots, no matter how high we flew, we always knew that there was a 'safe' place for us to return, in case we drifted to turbulent weather. The safety of the strong roots enabled us to fly higher and higher.

Have we given roots and wings to our children? In this mad helter skelter world, we are so busy with our own lives that we forget these simple things. These things ultimately matter in life. We are shifting from job to job and have no permanent place to live. Our children just tag along with us, often confused as to their roots. When they grow up, what will they imagine their childhood to be? A flurry of different homes, friends and places? 

We are also so busy with our own lives, that we do not teach them to fly. We just presume that we have given them wings, now its up to them to fly. Who will teach them to unfold their wings? Who will give them the safety and security of a 'mother base camp'? Do we spend enough time with them to understand them? Do we listen to what our children want out of their lives? If you have given them wings, support them in their ability to fly, no matter how many times they falter. Let them decide how high they can fly. Do not say 'no' or 'impossible' to them. Give them favourable winds and a 'mother base camp'. 

Roots and wings. Its the greatest gift you can give to your children. One that they will value when they are all grown up and good citizens of planet earth.

Note: I am sure some of you will disagree on the point that our parents gave us roots and wings. Some of us have not been so fortunate to get the support of our parents. Childhood abuse and neglect is common worldwide. Yet children from such families, still make magic happen. Don't blame your parents. Maybe that's the way they were brought up by their parents? I sincerely feel they mean you no harm and wish you well. Their way of reflecting it might be different. It may be wrong but maybe that's the way they are. Maybe you were sent in their lives, to sort them out? To show them what life is? Its your life, make it what you want it to be.

New Year

Happy New Year to all of you! 2009 is upon us and its another New Year. Its the beginning of a fresh year full of 365 days for achievement, success and happiness.

This is the time when we make resolutions and plan for the year ahead. Its a whole fresh year for us. We can leave the old year behind, no matter how it went. We can start afresh and accomplish all that we desire. We are given a new opportunity to put forth in action all the things we did not do the previous year. 365 full days for you to decide how you want to live them.

That's why we call it a 'New' Year! Let this year be the best you have ever had!